My writing has certainly slowed down these days. I guess that’s what seems to happen when life speeds up….unfortunately.
My life these days has been a crazy whirlwind. Not quite a disaster. Not quite happy. Not lacking excitement. I’m trying to be an actual adult lately. Diet plans, budgeting, scoping out new colleges, fitness goals, you name it I’m trying to do it…or get it together rather. Tennis has become a new hobby. Seems as though working my life away has become the new thing as well.
I’m tired. That’s seemingly an understatement to be honest. My body hates me, today especially. While my mind is young, my body feels ancient to me. My knees gave me trouble with every step I took, my wrists felt so weak when carrying things. Why do I feel like my body is in shambles?
Overall, I suppose I could say I’m happy. I’ve moved on and past an unhealthy relationship with my most recent ex. Working a lot, but it makes paying my bills so much easier. I have great friends. I’m trying new things. Preparing myself for the future. It’s just a lot to take in and do at times. Yet here I am doing it.
I’ve seen my mother a few times. In public. Just a glance. It was very strange. I didn’t feel upset, rather confused. That woman I saw with my two eyes is a stranger. Yet she birthed me, fed me, raised me, loved me even at one point. Now she’s just someone I use to live with, talk to, someone that once knew me.
I’m writing this with half open eyes. Half thoughts and half effort. I just felt the need to write something. Anything. It’s been far too long and I miss it. Such a great outlet writing is. I’ll have to add that to my list of things I need to do more often.